It’s tough. I’m nearing the two-month mark at my new school, and I need to realize that teaching is not for the glory or the praise.
It’s tough because as I’m doing what I think is good for my students, my students at the same time are mouthing off to me telling me that I am too strict, that I don’t know them enough, that I think I have power, etc etc.
It’s also tough because there is an element of truth to all they say, and yet they are so unfair about it because they fail to take in the context.
Lastly, it’s tough because on Friday, I caught a glimpse of how some kids are currently definitely set up to fail. At my past school, failure was natural, but in a sense, we offered alternatives (by not offering electives, having PE tutoring, and having 3-hour after school homework time). At this school, these alternatives are (thankfully) not in place. What this means is that academic growth is slower and and I need to take into account that some kids will just fall down a drain if I don’t slow down, differentiate, and reflect.
I’m just dreading it because I’m also having a hard time liking my students right now. One girl told me that they “test new teachers” (she meant it just honestly, not testily), and I’m to have meetings with a few students this week. Their issues with me, however, are things that I think comes with this overentitled perspective.. that I’m the newcomer and I don’t know “how things are done.” And that’s just unfair.
Finally, if I worked in Palo Alto, their starting pay is still more than my current salary. I know it’s not about that, but sometimes, it feels like it is.